Lip Service Series Two

God bless BBC3 and their right honourable thumbs up to the next series of Lip Service. The Glaswegian guilty pleasure is in production and I thought long and hard to myself "Just what could happen in series two?" and came up with these relatively facetious but highly likely possibilities:

1.) Frankie (played by the sultry eyed Ruta Gedmintas) and Cat will continue to have awkward sex lacking realistic passion but will claim to be madly in love with one another. They will also both continue sleeping with other people (Cat with Sam, Frankie with anything that moves... or doesn't move if it is a particularly attractive looking object).

2.) Tess will get newly published writer Ed to create a lesbian theatre show based on the lives of her and her friends in a blatant rip off / homage to Jenny Shecter's book cum movie Lez Girls. The two will have a massively successful opening night and will go home to get drunk and have sex, leaving Ed heart broken once again and Tess confused.

3.) Sam will cheat on Cat with Frankie after Frankie is arrested and taken into a cell. Sam will act disgusted by Frankie's rebellious, devil-may-care attitude but deep down she is a lesbian and no lesbian can say no to those big green eyes and floppy hair. Frankie will do it to spite Cat because she can't choose between the two. Drama!

4.) Sam will fall hard off her high horse and will crumble with the guilt. Perhaps an STD doing the rounds could cause a climactic moment between Cat and Sam where the two admit their guilt to each other at the same time?

Cat: I have something to tell you.

Sam: I've got something to tell you too.

Cat and Sam: I slept with Frankie. What?! You slept with Frankie!?

5.) Tess will go on Lou's morning show as a guest and the two will still have chemistry. Lou will ask Tess out on a date but will Tess be faithful to Fin? Probably not. More sex, more guilt, more drama.

6.) Frankie will continue to be an emotional whirlwind, one minute laughing and joking, the next taking offence at throwaway comments and acting like a five year old by stropping off in a mood. Her mates will continue to ignore or shrug off this behaviour rather than simply tell her not to be such a dick.

7.) Jay will be single for a while but young girls in bars will make him feel old and he will go back to that terrible actress that played his fiance in series one.

8.) The recession will hit Glasgow, leaving Tess and Frankie squatting in empty homes for weeks at a time with the unstable Sadie.

9.) Frankie will meet her Mother, but will recognise her from the Glasgay scene and will remember that they shared a drunken night of passion two years ago.

The series will end with some sort of cliffhanger. Frankie will probably run away again but while driving to the airport will end up crashing into Sam's speeding police car. Cat will be torn between whose bed to sit by. Whatever happens in the next series I know I will be watching and occasionally shouting at the television "Ha! I told you so!"